any which way

small things make all the difference in enjoying stuff. a perfect flat white (stop asking me what size Starbux. there can be only one*) and a ginger molasses cookie. how can these small simple pleasures incur such a huge release of endorphins? I asked on fb what people do when they want to get out and don't have anything specific planned. I got lots of lovely answers, the one I think I may have follow is hit a coffee shop. I'm so used to getting the coffee, drinking the coffee getting the fuck out. you know except on saturdays with my ladies. when I have no problem sitting, enjoying, taking my time. I find it harder to do on my own. like I'm taking up space that someone else might want. like I"m overstaying my welcome. while actually taking up less space alone. it's never to late to have epiphanies. like the one I had about white sauce. red sauce is significantly lower in calories and I had internalised this for my whole life. watch out for those extra cream calories. be careful you might enjoy something too much. I'm tired of watching other people enjoying what I want. I'm tired of worrying about taking up space. I'm tired a lot. I think I'm going to try to make this year the year I figure out how to be me without worrying about anything except BEING ME.

*Highlander reference FTW

she's so goddamn cold

going out never used to be a big deal. I used to do it all the time. anytime of the day. day/night whatever. now I have found that I'm not a huge night energy person. I wish there were dance parties in the afternoon. when I wrote that on fb my MIL told me that in the retirement house that her mum lives in (Chris' gran) they have them all the time. well fucking sign me up! I'm pretty sure they wouldn't like say Queens of the Stone Age* but that'll change when we get to that place right?? going out at night involves wearing pants of some kind and well.. I'm not sure much is worthy of that. I'd love to be proven wrong, maybe this has to do with not really drinking at all anymore? hangovers KILL me now. the last time I over imbibed (about 5 or 6 years ago maybe?) it took DAAAAAYS to feel better. I can't imagine that would be improved with time. so for now it looks like the party has stopped, at least for now.

* see what I did there?

merrymaking at my place

so pickles has this kinda gross thing going on with his coat. it's not *totally* grody, but he gets these little spots on his back near his tail. the good thing is I've figured out how to treat it. it's just this special shampoo. it's like 28$ a bottle but whatcha gon' do?* the thing is, it has to stay on him for like 10 minutes to work. that is a REALLY long time to have him in the kitchen sink (where I usually bathe the dogs) staring and trying to shake the stuff off. so I've solved the problem by letting him shower with me. I start out by getting him all lathered up and by the time I'm done I just rinse him off and VOILA!


but it is awkward as hell while we are both in there. sigh.  

*immortal words of Chris Rock

I'm up all night to get lucky

making a new playlist is always a bit of a chore. at least on my computer. it's not the picking of songs, it's getting my asshole 'puter to recognise my phone so I can sync it. feh. I usually make one list at the beginning of the year and add and subtract to it until the year is over. I've been doing this since 2010. 5 years. and some songs I put on it EVERY TIME?

I only eat candy -Nerf Herder
white lines -Grandmaster Flash & Melle Mel
lit up -Buckcherry
fuck shit up -Jon Spencer Blues Explosion
don't stop me now -Queen
what I got -Sublime

new song I am currently in love with is Bruno Mars Uptown Funk. oh MY!

tell me about your musical loves. or even just what you're digging right now. I"m in dire need of new stuff. do help a sister out...

Gamma Ray

my husband, who is normally a super caring, lovely guy did the shittiest thing ever. he went out and got a cold AND GAVE IT TO ME. clearly I couldn't have gotten it, what with not going out anywhere. the timing was pretty good though. it was at the end of the hols. so we didn't spend 2 weeks sneezing at each other. so that's a thing right? actually the holidays were pretty awesome. got to spend the day of our lord and saviors (or as we call it THURSDAY) birth with the kid and his super lovely girlfriend. I haven't had that nice of a day for a long time. and my Moms sausage* stuffing recipe was well represented (and EATEN YO) and we even ate at a table. I'd say like grown ups but nah. it was a card table covered with one of my scarves. gotta stay true.

our dogs are special.









*even though I had to use different sausage than normal due to "quality issues at the plant (E-COLI)" as tactfully told to me by the nice Safeway meat lady. PHEW BULLET DODGED.

don't stop me now

I went out yesterday. which is harder than it sounds when you don't really have anywhere to go. I took an art class last semester, and I loved it. but you know there really isn't anything out there for us stay at homes. like class wise. unless I really want to go back to school, which I don't. I don't want to have to ... ugh study. everything I want to do is geared to evenings and weekends. which I already have covered thanks. Dragon Age Inquisition ain't gonna play itself you know. seriously, I am bereft of learning experiences. if anyone has any ideas BRING IT.

in other news, pickles has been able to get up on the couch by himself for the last little while which has improved his quality of life immeasurably. baby steps baby girl, baby steps.

tainted love

weaksauce is better than no sauce right?

 this year is 12 days old. I've still not resolution-ed, or even found a class to take. I've been stalled and sick and silly. I'm frozen in a fat little heap of indecision and want. my car is working fine but I still don't go out. my eye has had a twitch for 2 solid days and I feel like it may be a metaphor for this coming prime number year for me. I'm flailing but not that hard. huh. this really should go in my blog but it's been idle so long I'm scared I'll wake it up.



 WAKE UP ASSHOLE. YOUR LIFE AIN'T GONNA WAIT FOR YOU LIKE A TAXI. GET GOING.